This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering" Ooooh that feels good "Understandingly this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in it caused an involutary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was. .. uh ... huh?" I said, totally confused."I said dinner is about ready," my mother said as she leaned into my room.I suddenly realized that I still had her panties on my face. I snatched them off and looked at the door in time to see my mother's smiling face disappear and the door close. "Shit," I almost screamed. What a jerk I am, I thought.I went down stairs with my face still red and saw my mother setting the table."I'll do that," I said with a sheepish smile."Thanks," she answered with her own smile. "Were you able to fix the sink?" Yeah. It was just a washer. I also fixed the light switch. It was sticking." Thank you again, sweetie. I don't know what I would do with all the things that need fixing around here."I smiled and began to set the table. We ate and talked about the visit to the attorney's office. Dad was not there. Mom said she signed a few legal papers. The divorce would take a while, but should be final in a couple of months. I saw sadness in her eyes."Sorry about all.
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